so things changed here and there and i just couldnt find out th reason why am i getting so affected these days . maybe its because im falling for someone else when it isnt th time to do so ? or isit just infatuation . but i guess not if not why would i get so affected .
things isnt going th way it was suppose to be .. i thought things are finally changing & yeah , but i guess it isnt . still finding out why am i going thru all these . even so , i cant be stronger , i cant stand up stronger . each time things like this happen , i fall to my lowest and tadah , nobody is there when i needed them . why isit that everyone is treating me this way . they say treat people how you want people to treat you . i did , but guess what nth comes back . why isit so ? idek .
still finding out why is it that God put me thru these kinds of situation again . firstly , i got over th prev one alr . now th same cycle came back . why is it so . why God why . i cant handle these kind of things well , i cant . i really cant . as much as i want to stand up stronger , things isnt helping , people arent helping . all they will do is to push me back down again . am i that weak to people arnd me ? is that why im getting this treatment each time ?
i guess i need to time off and just shut everyone out . i guess i need a getaway that nobody knows & wonder if they will look for me . i guess i need to find time to just fuck off from ppl . i guess its time for me to leave ppl instead of ppl leaving me . i guess .. i guess .. idk God just help me . im seek you , i need you , i want you . where are you God
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